Reflections...

I have had several people say that my blog has resonated with them - which is pretty funny to me, because it is simply the ramblings from the (sometimes) scary place that is my brain. But maybe, just maybe, this is something I should be paying attention to...

All of my life - I thought that I was the only one who struggled with food. The only one who packed it away in secret. The only one who was so ashamed of what I was doing - and how I couldn't seem to stop. The only one who would open a box of brownie mix and eat it dry from the box. I thought I was the only one who loathed what I saw in the mirror, which made me depressed, which made me eat more, which made me loathe even more. So I never talked about it - never saw that pain in someone else's life.

But MAYBE - if I had talked more about what I was feeling and going through - just MAYBE - someone else would have said, "That's what I feel!" And maybe knowing that I wasn't alone would have made the journey easier somehow. And we could have helped each other...

I'm truly glad that I decided to be open and honest about my surgery, and everything that has happened afterward. And if anything I say in these ramblings helps anyone who is reading it - then that is even better.

For the record, I no longer loathe what I see in the mirror. I am not at all where I want to be - but I am definitely on the road to get there. I enjoy looking for new signs of the weight loss. (I'm really excited - I saw just the faintest signs of collar bones this morning - just a shadow, really - but it's the first time in a long, long time there has been anything!) I enjoy the skin that looks clearer. I'm even enjoying the little bit of makeup that I've been wearing virtually everyday since surgery! (And for those that know me, that is saying something!)

So, I will keep blogging. And you keep telling me what you think.