Pants on the Ground

Back in November, right before we went on our trip to Canada, I was absolutely thrilled when someone at work gave me several pairs of jeans – size 20. I was able to fit into a couple of those pairs of jeans to take with me on the trip. This morning, I realized that I absolutely need to do some laundry – the jeans that I have been wearing all need to be washed. I rummaged through my dresser drawer – and found one of the pairs that I had been so excited about in November. I put them on, and to my delight, they were quite big. I put them on anyway – with a belt, to be sure – but I’m laughing at my baggy pants all day. They aren’t quite “on the ground” – but what a great feeling to know that I’m going to have to give these away.

So now, depending on the cut, I’m consistently wearing size 18 – with a few pairs that are size 16. Someone stopped me in the store the other day to compliment me on how nice my jeans fit me and how the top I was wearing nicely emphasized my waist and curves. What really cracks me up about that encounter is that it was a complete stranger! I have never met the woman before in my life – but she sure made my day.

I have no illusions about my body (at least, I don’t THINK I have illusions, but maybe that in itself is an illusion?). There are still plenty of places that stick out. There are droopy bits and pieces all over. Right now, with the exception of birthday and Christmas money that I have spent, I am wearing hand-me-downs (gently used). I’m not trying to be a fashionista or a beauty queen. But baby, I’ve come a long way from the size 32 (?) or larger that I used to be. And I’m still losing – still making good choices, and down 194.4 pounds - WOW!

I’m not what I want to be,
I’m not what I’m going to be,
But thank you, Lord,
I’m not what I used to be!