Parent for a Day

Start with some good friends who are taking a much-deserved two-week vacation.  Add an older sister who has to work all day on a Sunday.  Mix in a grandmother who has to be out of town.  And you’re left with a 13-year-old boy who was going to be all by himself for a very long Sunday.  There is no doubt in my mind that he would have been okay all by himself – but we let him spend Saturday night with us, took him to church and lunch afterwards, then spent all day on Sunday with him.

Being a parent – even if it is only for a day – is a LOT different from not being a parent.  For one thing, you have to be much more aware.  When we’re all together, it is Mom and Dad’s job to keep track of him – to make sure he is doing what he is supposed to do – and saying what he is supposed to say.  I never give it a thought.  But when I’m in charge – all of a sudden, I can’t just float in the pool – I have to keep an eye on him.  (That would be all I need – to have him running around the pool, and fall and crack open his head or break an arm, just in time for the folks to come back.)  When we are eating out with friends after church – I have to keep one ear on his conversation – to make sure he is being respectful.  Our friends have done a GREAT job!  This young man is sweet and funny, respectful and thoughtful.  Our job was really pretty easy this weekend.  But I’m still tired this morning – it is very different being a parent, even for a day.

It is kind of like the difference in going on a diet and making changes in my lifestyle.  A diet is a lot of work, but at the end of the day, it is still only temporary.  I can work hard at a diet, just like I worked hard at being a one-day parent, but eventually I’m done – and I quit working hard at the diet, just like I send my friend’s son home.  But making the necessary changes in my lifestyle is like being a parent full-time.  The responsibility doesn’t end quickly.  It is a long-term commitment, through the good times and the hard times; I might be able to take a little break, but I can’t turn my back on it.  And with a diet, I might feel good about it at the end of the day – like it felt good to be with my friend’s son.  But my one day of parenting will never give me the satisfaction of knowing that I raised my child to be an adult – taking responsibility for his actions – making wise choices – and becoming a person worthy of respect.  And my temporary diet will not give me dramatic, lasting results.

If had to choose the one-day parent – or the lifetime parent – I would definitely choose the lifetime.  And if I have to choose between the quickie diet, and the changes in lifestyle, I am choosing the changes in lifestyle.

“For the perishable must clothe itself with the imperishable, and the mortal with immortality.  When the perishable has been clothed with the imperishable, and the mortal with immortality, then the saying that is written will come true: ‘Death has been swallowed up in victory.’  ‘Where, O death, is your victory?  Where, O death, is  our sting?’”  (1 Corinthians 15:53-55, NIV)